The unidentifiable beauty of integration.
“What is expected of me as an immigrant? I would like to know”. A simple question asked to a Portuguese acquaintance that I occasionally meet on sunny day’s at the terrace of a cafe, just down the old bridge in Tomar. Normally the discussion, while waiting for holiday visitors to return from the Friday market, goes between our mutual interest in history and the National differences in thinking and acting between the people of our home countries. We both consider ourselves an exception to the rule when it comes to the current views on Europe by our countrymen. We both seem to have the same views on a lot of political questions, hoping against all odds that voters in the world will be as sane as the Canadians were a few months ago. We both think with much more nuance about the German First Minister than we did a few years ago, yes, we agree on a lot of things. It only happens a few times a year and these conversations are always a joy, although after a few beers it could be a bit difficult for others to follow our philosophical monologues towards each other.
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Within a few minutes after that simple question, a river of confirming and denying words confused me even more than when talking to a politician. Adapting to Portuguese customs is desirable, fighting against most of them even more important according to my friend, who is a former history teacher. It’s not only about learning the language, not about knowing your wine or learning to like bloody sausages. It’s getting your finger behind the meaning of friendly gestures, scraping of the historic surface that’s on top of the daily encounters with smiling people, always saying yes, promising impossible solutions and that culture of being obedient to superiors. “You could speak our language as if you were born here, but it doesn’t mean anything if you’re not able to understand what we mean to say”. Indeed an important thing to realize, even though it’s common in the country we came from to be polite while thinking something completely else.
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Sometimes it seems easy to adept, although doing the same things, the same way your neighbours do, often just seems strange. Buying an item or a tool, using it and then trying to sell it for the prize you’ve paid for it a while back is indeed copying the ongoing practice of trying to get the most out of it. It’s also very silly, when not knowing how that way of selling stuff is a cultural inheritance of times when all luxury was rare. Shops do have more than one of each item on their shelves nowadays, which hasn’t really sunk into the system of some generations of Portuguese citizens, but shouldn’t be a surprise to the ones that grew up with the chain from store to car boot sales. Internet gave us the possibility of comparing prices and offers and it’s a bit naive trying to find that one buyer who doesn’t know that. The days of loading up a truck full of heavy oak, out of date, furniture for free in the north of Europe and sell it for ridiculous prices over here in Portugal are over.
.
It will take some time, and maybe even longer before all customs learned in the day’s before this open, but young, democracy became a part of the Ikea world. However, history forced innovation forward and if you look around you, especially in this country, made sure that solutions were found for everyday problems and the lack of materials and possibilities. The question, in the end, is, do we take all cultural excrescence’s for granted, do we adapt to all the habits which are embedded in our new country’s society? I guess it’s getting a feeling for the right mix between embracing the good things from the past and supporting the ones that try to change and concur the old crooked, unnecessary and unfair walls that were built in times that inevitable will fade in the future.
.
After a few more beers, we’re back talking about a quote from Friedrich Nietzsche; “The future influences the present just as much as the past.” Just because, somehow we always get to that point where abstract thoughts make more sense than discussing daily life events. And yes, I answered the last question; “Is your glass half empty or half full?” by drinking my beer… “Completely empty, let’s order another one!”
.
Within a few minutes after that simple question, a river of confirming and denying words confused me even more than when talking to a politician. Adapting to Portuguese customs is desirable, fighting against most of them even more important according to my friend, who is a former history teacher. It’s not only about learning the language, not about knowing your wine or learning to like bloody sausages. It’s getting your finger behind the meaning of friendly gestures, scraping of the historic surface that’s on top of the daily encounters with smiling people, always saying yes, promising impossible solutions and that culture of being obedient to superiors. “You could speak our language as if you were born here, but it doesn’t mean anything if you’re not able to understand what we mean to say”. Indeed an important thing to realize, even though it’s common in the country we came from to be polite while thinking something completely else.
.
Sometimes it seems easy to adept, although doing the same things, the same way your neighbours do, often just seems strange. Buying an item or a tool, using it and then trying to sell it for the prize you’ve paid for it a while back is indeed copying the ongoing practice of trying to get the most out of it. It’s also very silly, when not knowing how that way of selling stuff is a cultural inheritance of times when all luxury was rare. Shops do have more than one of each item on their shelves nowadays, which hasn’t really sunk into the system of some generations of Portuguese citizens, but shouldn’t be a surprise to the ones that grew up with the chain from store to car boot sales. Internet gave us the possibility of comparing prices and offers and it’s a bit naive trying to find that one buyer who doesn’t know that. The days of loading up a truck full of heavy oak, out of date, furniture for free in the north of Europe and sell it for ridiculous prices over here in Portugal are over.
.
It will take some time, and maybe even longer before all customs learned in the day’s before this open, but young, democracy became a part of the Ikea world. However, history forced innovation forward and if you look around you, especially in this country, made sure that solutions were found for everyday problems and the lack of materials and possibilities. The question, in the end, is, do we take all cultural excrescence’s for granted, do we adapt to all the habits which are embedded in our new country’s society? I guess it’s getting a feeling for the right mix between embracing the good things from the past and supporting the ones that try to change and concur the old crooked, unnecessary and unfair walls that were built in times that inevitable will fade in the future.
.
After a few more beers, we’re back talking about a quote from Friedrich Nietzsche; “The future influences the present just as much as the past.” Just because, somehow we always get to that point where abstract thoughts make more sense than discussing daily life events. And yes, I answered the last question; “Is your glass half empty or half full?” by drinking my beer… “Completely empty, let’s order another one!”
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